What Am I Doing?

People ask me all the time, “Why are you involved in starting a new business? When are you going to really retire? When are you going to slow down and enjoy your life?” My answer is in the questions I ask myself: " What do I want? What am I doing? How is it working?" I’m not ready to retire, I’m ready to DRIVE forward and help ensure that more young people have happy, healthier, successful lives.

What am I going to do? I am going to work hard with Charlie Lyons and Sandra Gilmer. We started DRIVE because we all believe in the core principles of the Drive Educational System. We want to be where we need to be to help schools become thier best. I know what we do is important. I want to promote equity in all schools, eliminate the achievement gap, get bullying out of schools, and make sure that learning is fun for teachers and students. No small task but I know we can do it. And, we will take DRIVE anywhere..even a small village in the tundra of Alaska.

A few weeks ago I was working in a school in Nunapichuk, Alaska. Nunapichuk is a small village in the tundra of western Alaska. It is as different from where I live in piedmont North Carolina as it can possibly be and I love working there. It is challenging, interesting work. The faculty and students are terrific. But, I have been working for over 45 years, I am definitely not young. I don’t admit to being old, I call myself vintage instead. (Vintage items are perceived as more valuable than old stuff.) Just getting to this village is a challenge for a vintage person. It takes 1 full day to fly from North Carolina to Anchorage, Alaska. Day 2 is when it really gets interesting. I fly first to Bethel a small town 500 miles west of Anchorage. Next, I fly on a bush plane to Nunapichuk. Then, the real excitement begins! There are no roads in this village so there is no hopping in a nice, warm SUV to get to the school. If the weather is warm (35 degrees warm) I cross a river in a small fishing boat and then climb onto the back of a 4 wheeler to ride to the school – all of this carrying at least 2 pieces of luggage. If it is cold I ride a snowmobile from the airstrip to the school.

I have been to Nunapichuk about 7 times. I'd become comfortable making the trip. But, this spring the trip was different and caught me by surprise. I made the trip from N.C. to the village easily. I couldn't have asked for a better week of training. But, when it came time to leave the village, something had changed. The weather had warmed up. That probably doesn’t sound like a big thing. In fact, I thought it was great that it was warmer. After all, I live in the south. But the problem was, the river was starting to thaw. The ice had melted too much to support the snowmobile or 4 wheeler that would take me from the school to the plane and the ice hadn’t melted enough for a boat to be able to navigate across the river.

I rode from the school to the bank of the river on a 4 wheeler clutching my luggage. When I got to the bank there was a narrow, little plank that I was supposed to walk across to get to the icy part of the river. I froze. I couldn’t step on the plank. I felt pretty certain I would fall in the river or at least drop my luggage into the water. The school principal and one of the teachers traveling with me promised to help. Our guide was there to show us where to step so that we wouldn’t fall through the ice. (Remember, I am vintage.) I looked at the plank and thought to myself, “I can’t do this!”

I really didn’t want to “walk the plank.”

The river was wide. I kept thinking about being vintage and what people my age do and don’t “do.” My peers are safe in their houses, cooking dinner, picking up their grandchildren from school, or maybe taking a Zumba class. I couldn’t walk on melting ice across a lake! And then I started asking myself questions. What did I want? Who did I want to be? I wanted to get on that plane. I wanted to be a brave person. I wanted to be able to return to Nunapichuk to continue the work we had started. When I realized what I wanted and who I wanted to be, I knew what I was going to do. Thankfully, the principal and teacher carried my luggage. I walked across the plank. Then, I very carefully and slowly walked on that wet, slippery ice across the river. I crawled into a fishing boat to ride from the frozen part of the lake through the melted part to the bank. I climbed up the bank, walked to the plane, and climbed aboard. Whew! Was I tired? YES! But, I was proud of myself. I did it. I. Did. It.

Who do I want to be? I still want to be a player. I want to participate. I am not ready to sit on the bench. I want to DRIVE forward with the people and the work I believe in and keep asking myself the questions that get me where I want to go and keep me being who I want to be.

What do I want or who do I want to be?

What am I doing?

How is it working?